JESUS CARES MINISTRIES

Moriah's Story

"She's getting an abortion!!!" Chris declared with anger, "Moriah is getting an abortion."

She said it twice, almost to convince herself that it was really happening. I didn't believe it myself - not Moriah - she was so gentle - so soft spoken. I hung up the phone and instantly reflected back to a day two years prior. I found Moriah on the floor of the bedroom weeping as she gazed lovingly, yet ashamedly at her newborn. She held Maya out in front of her. Resting peacefully on her forearm, it was almost as if Moriah was laying her on an invisible altar. If we could see that altar it would be covered with tears - tears of gratitude for the mercy that God had extended to her in the form of this beautiful and perfect baby girl. She wondered how it could be that God could bless her with this valuable gift when all she had to offer him just nine months prior was a life of rebellion, deceitfulness and immorality. It was a precious and priceless moment. To see a young woman actually acknowledge God's merciful hand in such a deep and personal way was a very rare opportunity for me - one I would never forget. I wondered what she would do with this opportunity....

"She won't really do it," I said to myself. I came to the conclusion that she was just nervously talking. She just didn't want to face her parents again. The shame and disappointment would be unbearable.

They wanted her to live at the group home the first time when she was pregnant with Maya. She would place the baby for adoption and return home never to talk about the pregnancy or the baby again - like a bad dream that never really happened. Only by the grace of God did they have a change of heart and accept their grandchild and daughter back at their home to live. Moriah would have to agree to continue her education - high school and college, and make something of herself so that she could roll away the reproach of this terribly shameful act that she brought upon herself and her family. Certainly being successful and getting a higher education would be the restitution she could make to her family for being such a bad girl. Just two initials behind her name - MD. - would make up for this awful mistake. Wouldn't it??? Oh, and a car - of course she would need a car to get back and forth to school. Now, just come home and be a good girl and work twice as hard as before and don't ever let this happen again. Those words, or something like them, were probably ringing in her ears as she heard the results of her pregnancy test.

In spite of her intense fear of rejection and shame, I was still convinced she would never, ever get an abortion. It was just talk - a little denial about facing the inevitable. She would pull out of this and face her consequences. Chris was more convinced than I that she would go through with her plan -. perhaps because she herself had gotten an abortion years before. It was against the values that she had been taught as a child and her heart told her not to do it. She just waited for someone to stop her - but no one did.

If you saw a child in a pool drowning, would you walk over and calmly check out the situation to see if there was something you could do to help? How about if there were adults around that child talking and laughing and very unaware of what was happening right beside them? Wait a minute - maybe it's not really a child; it could be a toy or even a puppy, or maybe it's not really drowning. Would you take a chance - would you hesitate? Or would every instinct in you cause you to bolt over to the pool, desperately reaching out to save this helpless, innocent victim? I am ashamed to say that I walked - not ran - to the pool. Not because I wasn't sure he was a baby. I knew that. I wasn't sure the baby was really drowning. No - certainly the child's Mama will save him - he doesn't need my help...

After talking to Moriah myself, I realized that she had no intentions of telling her parents about her pregnancy. Not anytime soon, anyway. Though she was nearing her second trimester, her long, slender body had hidden her secret the first time for a long while. Surely she could do the same again. They would take away her car, she had decided, and kick her out of the house. There would be no way to redeem herself this time. Having the second baby would delay and even prevent her from making restitution for the first child. God's redemption had nothing to do with the decision - it was all about her parents - it was all about how they would feel and what they could live with. Nothing else seemed to matter.

I still couldn't believe she would follow through with it. Would she agree to kill her baby so she could keep her car and save face with her family? Would she allow the murder of an innocent life for the price of a car and her reputation?

... I walked over to the pool, but I hesitated waiting for the child's mother to take her rightful place as protector. Surely the child could wait...

I was feeling an eerie caution in my heart one night and decided to call Moriah. I didn't know until later, but she had visited a clinic that day. She already had a dilator in place to open up her cervix. The next day the abortion was scheduled. Her sister, Rena, answered the phone and told me that she was not available. She was nervous. I knew something was wrong and urged her to tell Moriah that I called and needed to talk to her. I told her it was very urgent. Would she give her the message? Was she covering for Moriah? "Oh God, please don't let her be an assistant to this murder. She's too young and innocent to be a part of something like this." Surely Moriah didn't tell her. Even if she did, Rena would never agree to this. She would see this all clearly; she would reach out to save this life - wouldn't she???

I prayed and cried out somehow knowing that I had not taken this whole situation serious enough. Was it too late? Somehow this had all gotten out of control. I had underestimated what the power of a spirit of fear can have on a person. Could it possibly have the power to influence this kind and gentle woman to allow a cold blooded murderous act to take place against an innocent life that God had ordained her to protect? I will never guess at that question again - the answer is emphatically - YES!

The next day - more prayer and helpless feelings. I went about my day as usual - homeschooling my children and driving to the other side of town for my daughter's volleyball game. Something told me not to treat this day as usual, but was that really God speaking? I had the realization that this baby's life was nearing extinction and I was not running to help. I should drop everything and run without hesitation to save this life. I just prayed harder. That would help. God will intervene. Someone will stop her.

As I sat on the bleachers that afternoon, my mind drifted. I couldn't focus on the game. I was normally the typical fan/Mom keeping my eyes on my daughter at every game, but today was different. Even though I still did not have the knowledge of the abortion that was scheduled that day, I felt a strange and compelling burden. Why didn't I do something sooner? Why did I ignore the feeling that my life needed to be disrupted that day to save the life of this child? I couldn't sit any longer. There was a lump in my throat and I decided to call Moriah's home. I reached for the pay phone and called her number. I had taken it with me - just in case. After all, I was going to be on Moriah's side of town. Maybe she would agree to meet me at the game. We could talk face to face. I would have to tell her that I've decided to tell her parents that she is pregnant. I came to the conclusion that this was the only thing I could do to save the child. If I told her parents, they would kick her out and take her car, but surely they would reach out and agree that she could not abort this baby. They might be angry for a lifetime - I was sure they were capable of that - but I never dreamed for a moment that they too, would silently agree to the execution of this innocent life. Silence is agreement - isn't it?

Her mother answered the phone. My heart was beating fast as I told her that something was wrong - very wrong and I needed to get a hold of Moriah right away. I asked if she could page her and tell her to meet me at the game. I tried to feel her out to see how aware she was of what was happening, without telling her everything I knew about the pregnancy and Moriah's plan to abort. She didn't admit to knowing anything, although her lack of questioning me of my urgency lead me to believe otherwise. I waited twenty minutes. Every second seemed to be deliberately slipping past me - like a mocking reminder from Satan that time was on his side. I called her mother back. Moriah had not answered her page. Then, I told her everything. With great urgency in my voice I told her that I feared that she was getting an abortion that day. Could she find her, please? Then came the truth - she suspected the pregnancy but did nothing about it. Why was she silent? Was she secretly hoping that if she turned her head long enough the problem would take care of itself?? I would never know, but it sure seemed she was playing a game of silence. If she didn't say anything she would not really be agreeing to the abortion - right? I hung up feeling very defeated and then suddenly it pierced my heart. Was my game really much different? Ya know - walking when you should be running - and watching and waiting when it's really your turn to move? Shame and sorrow were added to my feelings of defeat.

The next day I called expecting to hear a clue to what I feared the most. I spoke with Mom again about this fear. This time she reassured me that she wasn't pregnant. She told me that she confronted her about her suspicions yesterday. Moriah quickly produced the evidence that she wasn't pregnant. She showed her mother a blood stained pad as proof. "Everything is O.K..," Mom told me, "She's not pregnant."

I hung up disgusted and sickened. I knew what that blood stained pad was. It was the blood flowing from a womb that was recently invaded by a surgeon's knife. No - a surgeon is supposed to save lives. It was from the knife of a killer and the contents on that pad was not the blood of a monthly cycle, but rather the contents of what once surrounded and protected a living child.

Mom was still playing the game - trying to believe what seemed more noble rather than facing and admitting the truth. I was very angry at her, yet I could not escape from my own feelings of anger toward myself for my part in this tragedy. I could claim naiveté or just plain stupidity, but my conscience would not let me get away with that excuse. I repented before the Lord and vowed to myself that I would never let this happen again.

Several weeks went by before I saw Moriah. She was quiet and distant. Though she shed a few tears in our meeting, it was obvious that she was swallowing her emotions - something she had learned to do so well. I urged her to tell her parents about what had happened. For the sake of the whole family this situation needed to be brought before the Lord. Innocent blood was shed and needed to be confessed. I feared the consequences that would be brought upon this family if this was not handled God's way. She admitted that her parents probably knew already, but they weren't saying anything. She really didn't think they cared. As long as they didn't have to deal with another pregnancy, they were satisfied. I also feared what this would do to her little sister. She told me that her sister did know about the abortion and that she had covered for Moriah. Without confession, repentance and willingness to accept consequences, I was afraid that her sister might now think that an abortion would be an acceptable solution to a crisis pregnancy for a Christian - as long as it's concealed. Her sister would never have to deal with that decision, Moriah reasoned. Her sister's moral standards would never allow her to be in a situation like that. It would never happen to her sister.

The call came about midnight almost two years later. It was Moriah. Rena was pregnant and she didn't know how to help her. Rena wanted to get an abortion.

... I wasn't going to just stroll over to the pool this time and wait...

I urged her to bring her over the next day - even if she had to drag her. I wanted to talk to her and do everything I could to save the life of this baby. I told Moriah to be aggressive with her. Oh, and that wasn't all there was to the story. This was Rena's second pregnancy. She had already gotten an abortion several months prior! The nightmare happened a whole lot sooner than I had expected. Here it was, two years later and this Christian family was now responsible for shedding the blood of two innocent lives.

I called Chris and asked her to pray. I wanted to see if she would help me minister to this family. She had gotten an abortion, but she had also experienced an adoption with another pregnancy and she thought she could share her experience with Rena. She was happy to do anything that she could to help. The next day went by and I didn't hear anything from Moriah. I called her and found out that Rena had talked to a school counselor that day and decided not to come over to our home. I told Moriah not to give her a choice. Chris would come over and we would do what we could to convince her to save the life of the child. It was 10:00 p.m. before Moriah could get Rena over to the house. Chris brought pictures of the child she had placed for adoption and pleaded with Rena to change her mind. Rena was so cold and angry, but finally broke after we prayed and agreed to go see a counselor at a pro- life clinic. We got on the 24 hour hotline and made an appointment for the next day.

Everything was going smoothly. Rena kept the appointment with the counselor the next day. I drove by the clinic the next day around the time of the appointment. Without Rena's knowledge I went in and asked the woman at the desk if she knew how things were going. Rena had broken down and wept. The meeting was successful. She would not abort. I was so relieved.

My feelings of relief were very short lived. The next several weeks went by with Rena vacillating between abortion and keeping. At times she seemed so convinced that she could never go through with this abortion and then her heart would turn just as quickly in the other direction. Moriah was married now and had taken Rena in to live with her. Moriah and her husband offered to adopt Rena's baby. They also offered to support her and the baby should Rena decide to parent. Moriah deeply regretted the abortion she had gotten and was willing to help in any way she could.

I called Moriah and told her that I was sorry to do this when they had come to me in confidence, but that I would be calling her parents to inform them of Rena's intentions to abort her baby. I would give them the evidence and trust that even though they were very angry about the pregnancy, they would do everything in their power to save their grandbaby.

The next several days were quite unusual. I could not reach Moriah by phone and the numbers I had for her parents were wrong. I was feeling the same burden that I did the day of Moriah's abortion and I wasn't going to ignore that urgency again. I called Chris who lived on the same side of town as Moriah's parents. She got into her car immediately and allowed God to lead her to the home of the girls parents. It was truly miraculous. She had been going down a wrong street several days prior and for some reason looked up at the street sign and made note of the name. It was one of those unusual moments that you can't explain. It had been several years since she had been to Moriah's house and we didn't even have an address. We normally had record of their address in a mailing list that we keep, but the page with their name was torn and I didn't know how to get into the computer to get the information. No one was home who could help. I was very nervous, but committed the situation to the Lord. Chris instantly knew when I called her why God had allowed her to register the name of that street. It was the street Moriah's parents lived on. She drove down the street until she saw a familiar home. She was pretty sure she found the house and without further ado walked up boldly in spite of the late hour and rang the bell. Moriah's Dad answered the door and Chris asked if she could come in. Chris told him what was going on and he began to get enraged at his daughter's predicament. Chris talked to him for a while trying to calm him down and then called me on her cell phone and handed the phone to him.

I was not ready for what I heard that night. He told me that he would disown his daughter and that he didn't care what she did with her pregnancy. I told him that he would be responsible for the innocent blood shed and that he couldn't pretend that he didn't know. God would hold him accountable for this. I cried and pleaded with him, but he remained stubborn. I told him that it was his flesh and blood and that he needed to save this child's life at any cost. He didn't care and didn't want to know anything about what she was going to do with her life. All I could do was say, "God help you" and I hung up the phone. I could not stop sobbing. I loved this family. We had spent time with them and helped them through Moriah's first pregnancy. They were grateful to us and had promised to become supporters of the home. They never followed through with their promise, but our paths had crossed several times and they were always happy to see us. Even though I knew they had complacently stood by with Moriah's second pregnancy, I never thought they could actually allow this to happen now that they were confronted. They were Christians - they knew the Lord personally - "God, please forgive them and bring them to their senses."

It gets worse, much worse. They took a step that I didn't believe was possible for a Christian. They supported Rena's decision to abort and actually encouraged her to do so. This kind of support angered Rena. She saw through the hypocrisy of it all and it disgusted her. Still, she felt it was too hard to choose life when the only way to get back into her parents graces was to kill her child. She was kicked out of her home and the only ticket back was to abort!

Many people were praying for this unborn baby and through the prayer chain we found out about a special church service for those who have aborted and need healing and forgiveness. She agreed to go and God touched her heart. She broke once again and tears flowed. She assured us that she really couldn't go through with another abortion. I wanted so much to believe her but I was not going to allow my naiveté to get in the way of God's urgency again, and so we prayed and fought hard for this child's life. I began to think of the day that I would hold this baby in my arms and say, "Everything's O.K., baby. We fought hard for you and you made it."

...I reached out desperately to pull this child out of the water. I had vowed never to wait by the pool again...

Rena's parents took another step toward lawlessness. They offered to pay for Rena's way through college if she would abort. It was a college that she had dreamed of going to someday. They offered to pay for the baby's father to go to college. They were bribing her with money and material gain! They even made an appointment for her at the abortion clinic. They were very angry at us for trying to convince her to choose life. That wasn't all. They did something that I believe is the greatest reproach against our precious Savior and Giver of Life. They offered to pray for God's protection for Rena as she lay on that table allowing someone to kill their grandchild!

This precious baby was killed for the price of a college education. Mama wants to be a doctor. How ironic! Some day she will be healing patients - but not today. Today we kill a life - but tomorrow we save them. I weep for this baby. I fought hard for this baby, but...

... the next time I will fight harder. The next time I will run faster....

This story is true, though the names have been changed for the sake of anonymity. I wish it weren't true. For me it was like living out a horror novel. I am still in disbelief, but this experience has answered some questions that I have been seeking answers to for a long time.

My disbelief is not due solely to the fact of experiencing firsthand the pain of losing a child that you are desperately trying to save. I understand that abortion happens in our country to the tune of one life every fifteen seconds. We have been killing children in our country "legally" for almost thirty years. I am not in disbelief about that. I am angry and I am grieved, but that is not what I am struggling to believe. What I can't believe is that I experienced this tragedy with a family that claims to be born-again Christians. Church-going, bible-believing, walkin' with the Holy One Christians! I have been through this scenario before with heathens and even with some "religious folk", but I have never seen the parents of a Christian girl go through such drastic measures to convince their own flesh and blood to kill their seed! I will never understand that, but I do see more clearly now, why it happens. That leads me to the purpose of writing this article. It was not just for drama sake that I've taken the time to put this on paper. There is a "skeleton in the closet" that was uncovered through this experience that explains why divorce, incest, adultery, suicide and murder are taking place within the walls of the "Christian" church.

Let me take you back to a story long, long ago. A Hebrew leader is relishing in the joy of a great and mighty victory for his nation. God came through and gave them supernatural strength to defeat a very powerful foe. The massive walls of an enemy city crumbled before them. On to the next battle - sharpen your swords and let's do it again. Uh- oh, we lost! How could this happen! Is God playing some kind of a trick? Their once fearless leader cowers under the shame of defeat and cries out to God for answers. The answer comes quickly - there is sin in the camp. It must be found and judged. God doesn't tell who it is - he leaves that to the leader. One by one each tribe, family, and household passes through the fear of judgment. Why didn't God just pick him out and remove him right away? I believe God wanted them all to have the experience of examining their hearts before a Holy God. Just imagine that you were contemplating sin at that time. I think it might turn your heart in the right direction - don't you?

Achan is exposed and his sin discovered. He had taken some spoil that God clearly marked for destruction and was hiding it under his tent. He hoped no one would find out. What a mistake. The whole nation watches as God's judgment passes over this man and his family. His family suffers for his sin as they are all taken outside the camp to be stoned and burned. Did you ever read this story and get angry at God for judging so harshly? Many people do. Only because they don't understand God's merciful attempts to show us the destructive power that hidden sin can have in our life and the lives of our children if it is not covered by the blood of Jesus.

How about the lives of the men that were lost in the battle? The strength of this whole nation was spoiled because of the sin of one man. My, my, is it any wonder that the church seems so void of the power that God said we would have if only we believe on Him?? Disunity, wrong doctrine, church splits, and compromise can all be blamed for the lack of strength in the church, but do we realize the power of hidden sin? Do we realize that it has the power to drain the strength of God's people as we fight the battles of pornography and homosexuality and adultery and yes, abortion in our nation today. Can we really succeed in fighting a battle for our nation that has never been conquered in the Church? It can't happen and it won't happen - not until we dig up the sin and cover it in the blood of Jesus.

The most startling discovery I made during this time of ministering to this Christian family was to learn of a sin that had been hidden in this father's tent for a long time. The family had found out about a child that he had conceived out of wedlock many years ago. It wasn't discovered by the children until after they had both experienced being pregnant out of wedlock. How did it get uncovered? Some "freak" happening. It all has a way of surfacing, you know. Your sin will always find you out. It was a child he wouldn't acknowledge or provide for. How could he persuade his daughter to kill her child? Why did he want his firstborn to adopt her baby when she was pregnant for the first time? His hidden sin was getting too close to his home now. It was eating at him every time he saw his unmarried daughter's belly growing bigger and bigger. It was tormenting him when he found out that his baby daughter was pregnant with child. The ground was opening up to disclose the fruit of what he had planted long ago.

How could he kill his grandchild? It's a little clearer for me to see now that I know the step that preceded this happening.. He rejected his own seed and never repented of it before God and his family. Unconfessed, hidden sin always has a next step. It always has an agenda that leads us away from righteousness. Why do we see heinous sin in the church? Why is there so much mental illness, immorality, confusion, and defeat. Many of the sins we see are the "next step" from sin that has never been covered in the blood of our Savior. I have experienced it myself. The torment of trying to hide something that you know you must be accountable for to a Holy God. It screams at you, even though you remain silent. The fruit of it starts to "visit" your life. If only we will see these visitations as God' s attempt to help us come clean. They are God's reminders that we have some unfinished business.

I talked to Moriah recently. She is longing for her husband to share her faith in the Lord Jesus Christ. She has been praying for him and so have her parents. Does God acknowledge those hands lifted up in prayer when they're stained with innocent blood? Moriah's husband does not believe in abortion. This precious young man has a greater respect for life and God's creation than his Christian family. So where is the salt and light? Where is the strength of God's people?

My purpose for writing this article is two-fold. I pray that through this story you will seek God's plan for your life concerning what you can do for the unborn. They need a voice. I pray that you won't be as naive and complacent as I was should God drop a situation like this in your lap some day. My other purpose for this article is to encourage you to get your heart right before God. Let Him bring any "hidden" sin before your eyes that needs to be confessed and covered by the blood. Pray for the church and the Achans that are fooling themselves into believing that hidden sin is harmless as long as it is concealed and buried. Ask God to give you eyes to see through the overwhelming problems in the lives of those around you and the courage to lead them in exposing and pulling the roots of hidden sin that will release them from bondage and confusion.

Will the nation ever turn over the Roe vs. Wade decision? Not likely. Not unless the Achans uncover their sin. Not unless parents stop leaving their seeds of murder covered up and waiting for the next generation to eat of its fruit.